themusemanor | PSL - Will Zimmerman | Helen Magnus ---> I can feel your sorrow

Entry tags:

PSL - Will Zimmerman | Helen Magnus ---> I can feel your sorrow

After nearly a day of being stranded in the Gulf, Helen and Will were finally rescued and taken back to the Sanctuary. Helen had spent most of the remaining travel time very quiet. Coming up with a believable lie as to what they were doing so far off their flight plan and how they'd gotten down there in the first place, she'd had to deal with the helicopter rental place. Those encounters had taken her remaining strength and stability. She no longer had it in her to converse.

She barely even paid attention to what Will was doing during their plane ride back to New City. Her Old Friend picked them up at the airport and soon enough, they were back in the Sanctuary. Helen didn't even say more than a handful of words to anyone, telling them all that she needed to rest before she turned and strode for her office.

That had been two days ago. Ashley's birthday was two days from now and the closer that day came, the more Helen felt her heart tearing itself out of her chest. So much had happened in such a short period of time. She'd asked Will to stay with her for this and she knew that her seclusion would worry him. If Will knew her at all, and if she knew him, he would soon come to poke at her and that was likely for the best. She needed a friendly, supportive, and unbiased face as her own was none of these things.

And the memories hurt too much to endure alone.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Will had been glad to keep quiet on their trip home from the Gulf. Sure, Magnus had come up with an excuse for the helicopter rental and what had happened to them, so they'd made it home with relative ease. But what she had confided in him, about Ashley's birthday, had weighed heavily on his mind all the while. He'd felt pretty guilty about being so selfish, wanting to get to that conference without even really trying to understand the reason she might want him to stick around.

Wrestling with that feeling was why he was on his way to her office now. Two days had given them plenty of time to recover, but they hadn't spoken during that time and he knew now was about the time to check on her. Actually, he wasn't even sure she had eaten, so just in case he brought along a sandwich on a tray for her. Made it himself too.

Standing outside her office door, he placed the tray down on a nearby table and knocked. Often he'd walk right in, but today was not one of those days.

Helen had once asked Will to be her emotional compass, to keep her grounded and tell her when she wasn't thinking clearly. That was part of the reason she'd asked him to stay with her when Ashley's birthday passed. Henry would be mourning in his own way, Kate's only memories of Ashley were of the Source Blood-infused Super-Abnormal she'd hit with a rocket, and as much as Helen loved her Old Friend, she needed a far less biased support system. With a sigh, Helen rested her head in her hands and tried to take deep breaths so she would stop thinking about Ashley's final moments.

Right on cue, a knock sounded at her door. It took her a few seconds longer to compose herself, but soon she called out, "Come in." The door was unlocked, as she'd expected Will to want to see her, perhaps even hoped for it on some level.

For the first time in a very long time, Helen Magnus did not want to be alone. Perhaps it would be the same in January, when James' birthday came about, but for now she was too focused on her daughter to think about anything else.

When he heard the okay to come in, Will opened the door to her office and stepped inside. As expected, she looked tired. He took further mental notes as he looked her up and down, taking in her posture and the movements of her facial muscles. He walked forward, "Hey." It was a short greeting, but not in any way intended to be rude.

"I thought you might be hungry," he added, holding up the tray and then setting it down on her desk. "Just in case." She could refuse if she wanted; she had in the past and he took no offense.

He waited to take a seat, "How're you doing?"

It was a greeting befitting of the type of relationship they'd fallen into. He was her caretaker when she couldn't do it herself, in the rare instances when she allowed someone to try to take care of her. Her face was worn, eyes slightly red from a few tears having fallen earlier in the day. Her composure was back, but she was distancing herself and her tea had long since gone cold.

She did try to smile, though it was as tired and worn as the rest of her. "Thank you." The tray was left alone for the moment, as she had yet to eat or want to, but it was kind of Will to offer and she wanted him to know that, even if she couldn't put it into words.

"I'm fine." It was a terrible and blatant lie - they both knew it - but one she had to tell nonetheless. She wouldn't be Helen Magnus if she didn't. "How's your work coming for the day? Still angry with me for cancelling your trip?"

It was a terrible attempt at a joke, but she needed something to lighten the mood around them and distract herself from the important day coming up.

As expected, there were signs of her sadness written on her face, but her knew better than to say anything about it. "No problem," Will answered as he plunked down in a chair, resting his hands on its arms and leaning back.

He nodded at her answer, tilting his head to the side. Of course she wasn't fine, but he'd play along and keep the conversation light as a start. The attempted joke actually caused the corners of his mouth to twitch upward in a smile, thinking of how they had bickered about the conference almost nonstop just a few days ago.

"Everything went fine today. Looks like all the stuff I planned to catch up on after the conference got done ahead of schedule. So I'm not complaining."

Even bickering about his conference would be preferable to leaving Helen alone to her thoughts at this point. His response made her lips curl upward at the edges, the closest to a genuine smile that she had come in days.

"Is that a plea for more work or should I leave you to your misery?"

Banter, bicker, talk -- Helen didn't care what way the conversation went. She just needed a distraction, something else to focus on. At least for now.

Score. There was a least a teeny hint of a smile, which made Will feel like this was completely worth it. "Oh, you know me, I'm always pleading for extra work to do." He grinned as he said this, waving a hand like it was nothing at all.

"If there's no paperwork, I also do windows."

A tiny smile followed by an actual laugh; soft as it was, it still make her smile widen. This what what she'd needed. "Oh, good. I daresay mine may need a good washing soon."

Her expression turning thoughtful for a moment as she took this joke and ran with it. "What about floors? Do you charge extra for those?"

"Lucky for you, I remembered to pack my squeegee. Never leave home without it." He motioned with his thumb over his shoulder, as if the said cleaning tool was sitting somewhere nearby.

Will folded his arms then, pretending to think about it. "Oh sure, floors are my specialty. And since you're the boss, I'll give you a decent discount."

"You're always so prepared. What would I ever do without you on my staff?"

And she meant that in a double way. If she didn't have Will, if he hadn't been there for her when Ashley was killed and again now, she wasn't sure how she would have made it through. He was her emotional compass and she was so grateful he was willing to help ground her.

"You wouldn't have nearly as much fun, I can tell you that much." Will leaned forward at that and plucked a potato chip from the plate he'd brought her. Popping it into his mouth, he sat back and regarded his boss with the same thoughtful expression he always had when he was mulling something over.

"But seriously, if there is any other work I can do to make things easier on you, you know I'll get it done. If not, we'll think of something else."

Helen chuckled softly and ducked her head momentarily, her eyes on the chips. They did look a little appealing and Will was right: she did need to eat.

"You know burying myself in my work helps keep me occupied, Will," she told him, slowly reaching over to pick up one of the chips. By now, everyone in the Sanctuary, even Kate and Will, knew her well enough to know that when something upset her, she tended to dive into her work and never surface. Eating and sleeping schedules were tossed until whatever was on her mind stopped eating at her. Often this took weeks, sometimes months, but eventually she would calm down enough to fall back into her routine.

She hadn't found that tranquility for this event yet and likely wouldn't for a very long time.

"Besides, I don't think you want me giving you all of the paperwork that involves speaking different languages." A teasing smile played across her face as she propped her elbow up on her desk and leaned on it so she could finally look at her protege again.

He'd known that Magnus would never take him up on the offer, but he'd given it anyways. Seemed like the responsible thing to do anyways, as a member of the Sanctuary staff. "How could I forget?" He just smiled at that, watching her pick from the plate. Hey, this was something at least.

It would take a while for Helen to fall back into the right rhythm, he knew that. All he could do was make sure he did what he was best at, keeping her on track and emotionally stable. It was tough to be sure, he found himself getting a little choked up now and then when he passed places that reminded him of Ashley. Though he had not known her that long, she had indeed become family. That much had been clear only a few weeks after he started working here.

But this, right here and now, was the perfect set up. Just talking, nothing heavy. Friends enjoying each others company and making jokes about work. "Oh God no, that would be awful. I'd offend half the globe in a single night." Ah, eye contact. This was even better.

Helen just gave him a smirk that clearly said, "How indeed?" before she lifted the chip to her mouth and actually took a bite out of it. Small, but at least it counted for something.

She knew that in order to find peace with everything, she had to accept Ashley's death, and the only way to do that was to finally pay a visit to her daughter's room. The door had been closed after the Cabal had taken her and Helen had silently banned everyone from entering the room. Most of them knew better than to even imagine it and Kate valued her life far more than to press about the room after the initial question that told her it had belonged to Ashley. Helen didn't want anyone intruding on the last piece of her daughter she had left and she wasn't certain when she would be able to face that room. At times, she was able to walk by it while ignoring its existence, but more often than not, she avoided that hallway completely, even going as far as to take a path that was well out of her way to bypass it.

Helen Magnus was the queen of denial and avoidance. She knew she needed to face that room, but she didn't want to and doubted she ever would.

Will's answer snapped her from her thoughts and she smiled in response. "Lucky for you that's my job. Learning how to say complicated phrases in Norwegian or any of the African dialects was difficult enough decades ago."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

PSL - Will Zimmerman | Helen Magnus ---> I can feel your sorrow

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject